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Old 07-11-20, 01:44 AM   #3
jeff5may
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Sounds eerily like my dad. Fingers crossed it isn't. Here's a typical call on any given day:

"Hey Jeff, can you come take a look at this yesterday? The dad blame ____ quit." Ok dad, no problemo. Gimme a minute. Grab job bag ___ and throw it in shotgun.

So I get to the place (usually a rental, barn, shop, or shed of some sort) and my dad is stuck in a trap with two buckets full of dollar store, Walmart and harbor freight slop tools and hardware. Been here yesterday and before I got there today, and it's gotta be this. If it's obvious damage (plumbing or bent/dent/rip/ravel), I know he reached the end of his rope and now what? If the cause isn't obvious, I start asking questions.

Chances are, either way, Walmart meter or harbor freight pressure gauge or super widget pegged and died in short order, so dad had a hunch and blew up 30 bucks worth of fuses and "cross fingers" parts yesterday. So now I'm it. Yayyyy.

Always first words: "Ok dad, gimme a 2 minute rundown and then we can get outta here." Fully 9 out of 9.1 times, I have an "aha" moment during the speech, and either turn directly to the solution staring at me, or grab an instrument and find he's been chasing his tail. After the speech, it's what about the gorilla wrench or did you check the other leg of the thing? "Nope, broke the blargeddy daggone toolie thing with a 3 foot pipe. What other leg?"

"Ok, hold on a second. Yep. I know what to do. Go to appliance house and get a trailer heat sequencer. Module number b. Not the relay, not the fuse, the whole module. Get the 40va control transformer and a 12 inch nipple for the gas thingy. I don't know, it's a heat pump. The gas is emergency backup. I don't judge. Then go next door and ask for the Leinie canoe paddle."

Zoom!

Chop, cut, bypass, get online. Start up a chit chat with impatient whoever. "Man, I though we were doomed fur Shure!" Nope, Neil got it done again. Neil who? Mr. Armstrong to you! Pipe wrench of doom, conqueror of the lost, breaker of the tenacious hordes!
"Ok man, it's just a tool..."

Grrrrr... Oh, hi dad! I need a paddle, NOW!

"They were out, so I got you a Busch light."

Thanks, El cheapo. Go cut the power.

Hey guys, who wants a shotgun shower? No body? U sissies!

Ten minutes later, we gone! Here dad, take this poss water. Nope, nobody wants it. Nope, way past a paddle, I'm ready for a one armed scissor.

Last edited by jeff5may; 07-11-20 at 02:20 AM..
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